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vulnerable people and gambling - kellyh5291 - 03-01-2018

So i have suffered from dyslexia since school and also have a maths issues ( i can't spell what it's called). I was on live chat with a gambling site and suggested that a calculator to add up my bet history so i can see what i have wagered. I explained that i have these issues and now my account has been suspended. I have searched the net and it seems i may be classed as a vulnerable person ( which is really strange to me). Does anyone kow how this would affect my future gambling habbits? 

Please don't think this post is in vain, I have had major issues with my gambling and still have a few hiccups. I'm not looking for a easy way to get money or to cause issues for the site itself as i have seen many posts asking as they are vulnerable should they get a refund. I have gamled since i was 16 years old. I first started buying scratch cards and would spend all my money, i then went onto slot machines which made the addiction ten times worse. Over time i did manage to gain control of my spending and i am proud that i can now play for enjoyment and not for the fact of winning. I now play poker which i found really helped manage my money, even though i would lose a lot of games i found that i actually enjoyed the games and the articles on bankroll management really helped. I went from spending £xxxs a week to £xx a month, I have made mistakes and put more money at times to just chase a win but i have punished myself and banned myself from playing any gambling activities. I'm proud to say that i control what i spend and i control what i lose. I now think about what money i can afford to lose if i want to play. 

I have joined GA because i still gamble and i understand i can still fall.


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - smartie - 08-01-2018

All the best to you in your choices Kellyh5291. i'm glad you have found a solution that is working for you and hope this continues to be the case however this can be a progressive addiction and not everyone may have the options you and others who may control it have.

Its why recovery for me depends a lot of honesty and I accept i crossed the line into addiction with the potential life and death consequences if i gamble again.

Just remember if things change and you do decide you want to stop gambling to check out your nearest GA meeting...

All the best
Smartie xx


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - Lin0561 - 14-02-2018

I am not the gambler , my adult son is , he demands money from me and I feel a huge pressure to give to him ! He has never told me or said gambling is a problem but his behaviour makes me believe it is .
I give in and give money and my self and my counsellor feel my behaviour has also become like an addiction , and so fuelling him, like a mother who gets drugs for an addict , I was wondering if other family members use this site and have any ideas :help with how to deal with the threats from my son , to help me to be strong to not give in to him ?!


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - Simmo - 16-02-2018

(14-02-2018, 10:03 PM)Lin0561 Wrote: I am not the gambler , my adult son is , he demands money from me and I feel a huge pressure to give to him ! He has never told me or said gambling is a problem but his behaviour makes me believe it is .
I give in and give money and my self and my counsellor feel my behaviour has also become like an addiction , and so fuelling him, like a mother who gets drugs for an addict , I was wondering if other family members use this site and have any ideas :help with how to deal with the threats from my son , to help me to be strong to not give in to him ?!

As the son who was always going to my parents for bailouts, on reflection my life would have fallen apart alot sooner without the bailouts and I would have been forced into recovery earlier.  For what they were doing out of love, and I, at the time took for granted, actually enabled me to continue gambling.  No amount of money was ever enough.  Now I look back, the best thing my parents could have done was to not give me any money at all.  They don't have any addictions and live a normal life, so don't have the understanding and I was able to manipulate them to serve my own selfish ways.  

Be strong, do not give him any money, but give him love and support, i.e. help in any way other than giving him money.  Suggest going to GA meetings, counselling, talking about his feelings, not easy I know, I have a 19 year old son.  

Wishing you well

Simmo


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - smartie - 17-02-2018

(14-02-2018, 10:03 PM)Lin0561 Wrote: I am not the gambler , my adult son is , he demands money from me and I feel a huge pressure to give to him ! He has never told me or said gambling is a problem but his behaviour makes me believe it is .
I give in and give money and my self and my counsellor feel my behaviour has also become like an addiction , and so fuelling him, like a mother who gets drugs for an addict , I was wondering if other family members use this site and have any ideas :help with how to deal with the threats from my son , to help me to be strong to not give in to him ?!

Hi Lin0561, stories like yours are a powerful reminder for me of why i need to keep working the GA recovery program, so i agree with all Simmo says.  However I would add, have you considered getting in touch with Gam-anon for yourself?

Gam-anon is the sister organisation of GA that supports the families, friends and loved ones to help them understand the addiction that is compulsive gambling.  May help for you to have a look at their website?

All the best

Smartie xx



RE: vulnerable people and gambling - Andybown1987 - 07-03-2018

Am a compulsive gambler and need help, i have done really bad things to the people i love to fund my lifestyle. Im now 30 and started gambling from a very young age. I tried ga a few years ago but slipped back into gambling. It 100% controls me as a person and hand on my heart i hate it. I feel this is my last chance before i lose my family. I dont know what to do and my anxiety and emotions are makeing daily life painfull. Am sorry for sounding so negative but i really need help. I feel so depressed


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - smartie - 07-03-2018

(07-03-2018, 10:13 PM)Andybown1987 Wrote: Am a compulsive gambler and need help, i have done really bad things to the people i love to fund my lifestyle. Im now 30 and started gambling from a very young age. I tried ga a few years ago but slipped back into gambling. It 100% controls me as a person and hand on my heart i hate it. I feel this is my last chance before i lose my family. I dont know what to do and my anxiety and emotions are makeing daily life painfull. Am sorry for sounding so negative but i really need help. I feel so depressed

Hi Andy,
Nothing stopping you going back to GA as long as you have a desire to stop gambling....
Did you work the 12 step program last time? Get a sponsor? If you still have their details maybe get in touch before hand, otherwise just turn up...

All the best and any questions email back

Smartie xx


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - Andybown1987 - 07-03-2018

I didnt get a sponser but i will attend the next meeting just had a look when it is, i hope i can do this for my family's sake and my own. I did stop gambling for i think 7 months once but when it came back it was worse. Iv been gambling everyday recently and its all i think about n dream about. I thinl its still hard to face the fact this is forever and will never go away so just feeling down now. Thanks for your response and wish you well.


RE: vulnerable people and gambling - Chris_b - 27-06-2018

Hi Andybowen87, I wondered if you had managed to find your way back to a GA room?